The Visible Woman...February 10, 2004

One thing needs to happen and then another becomes clearer. I'm waiting for various reasons and there is no reason I can't accomplish things while waiting but I don't necessarily do it.

It's happened to me more than once in my life. Many, many times, in fact. You are waiting for an event, the result of a test, an e-mail, a confirmation to proceed. Something. And everything seems to be pending.

Plans will be set based on the outcome of Dad's biopsy and our discussions with the doctors tomorrow. I don't feel like committing to certain things today.

I need to make some reservations for Dallas where we are going in a few weeks. I need to make some reservations for our trip to France in the summer.

I just let things pend.

We are also waiting for the floor guys to do things, finish up, before other peopl can try to fix things. It seems like everything is on hold.

And this, in a way, is comforting. Waiting for this and that.

	waiting One thing needs to happen and then another becomes clearer. I'm waiting for various reasons and there is no reason I can't accomplish things while waiting but I don't necessarily do it. It's happened to me more than once in my life. Many, many times, in fact. You are waiting for an event, the result of a test, an e-mail, a confirmation to proceed. Something. And everything seems to be pending. Plans will be set based on the outcome of Dad's biopsy and our discussions with the doctors tomorrow. I don't feel like committing to certain things today. I need to make some reservations for Dallas where we are going in a few weeks. I need to make some reservations for our trip to France in the summer. I just let things pend. We are also waiting for the floor guys to do things, finish up, before other peopl can try to fix things. It seems like everything is on hold. And this, in a way, is comforting. Waiting for this and that.
mental and otherwise
JUST TYPING I'll just wait and see. At this point, I'll do something. When I find out this, then I'll do that. Excuses surely. But the finest ones.
		Food Diary. *breakfast* nothing *lunch* two slices of whole wheat bread with melted white cheddar green onions *snacks* a bunch of all sugar candy (about two hundred calories worth) dinner [El Chile] queso and several tortillas a couple of margaritas some guac and hot sauce and chips cheese enchiladas with chile sauce and beans and rice a beer Today I - ate like a pig and only bad stuff for good measure.
		Time flies.... I am up at 7:30 and I dress for the gym and fool with the taxes a little and leave some notes for our bookkeeper who is coming by. I finish yesterday's journal. Then I head for a workout. I don't think any workmen will be here when I get back so I don't plan to shower there. I go downtown first to return the videos we rented. The club is really crowded for some reason. After my workout, I go home, shower, have lunch, talk to the bookkeeper and to SuRu on the phone. Then I straighten up a few things in my office. It is quite tedious. Things just get away from me. I find myself sorting stuff that should have been filed in 1992. Someone drops by with a picture to be scanned. I do it and mail it to FFP. I fold laundry and brush my teeth. I talk to the maid and the bookkeeper. And then I go see a movie. I meet a friend and the two of us and two other people watch The Cooler. I am trying to see films that are nominated. Alec Baldwin has been nominated for supporting actor for this one. I don't know. At the end we aren't sure if we like it or not. We go back to my house to wait to go out to dinner for my friend's birthday (tomorrow). My birthday friend and I get there early but our other friend is even earlier. We eat, drink, talk. The friend we meet says she heard that a colleague of ours from long, long ago had committed suicide. [Ed. note: Tomorrow morning before our protagonist gets out of bed her husband will say, "I checked the obits and nobody we know died." She will then mention the suicide which is not in the paper. He will say, "Isn't that the guy who fell in our hot tub at some party?" She will remember the incident, vaguely. The hot tub was pulled up and discarded a decade ago to make way for THE ROOM.] After the meal, my friend and I drive to the other friend's house in South Austin and look at it and discuss the remodeling she proposes. Then it's home for reading and TV.

		Reading. Newspapers. The Conquerers by Michael Beschloss. Omaha Beach; A Flawed Victory by Adrian R. Lewis. [Finshed this one. Still say the guy had twenty pages or material and stretched it to a couple of hundred.]
		nothing
		Exercise one hour on recumbent bike ab exercises
	. .	Mood is pretty relaxed with tension and expectation at the core.
	It's a Tangled Web we weave...these days of our lives.	One year ago "I did the bike. I did my upper body. I climbed the 106 steps to the top of Mt. Bonnell. I took a Comtrex and it made me goofy." Two years ago "So at the end of all that, I decided to stay hiding in plain sight. It's all there, but will anyone find it without directions?"